11 March 2007

Waiting, and the pressure mounts

More news has arrived on the school front. I received a letter from The University of Chicago stating that I was not accepted into their PhD program. That was a big disappointment. While I was pretty sure the Northwestern would not accept me, I believed that I had more of a chance at U of C. With just two more Chicago options left, I am starting to feel a bit antsy. The possibility that I may not get into graduate school now has to be considered. What will I do if I am living in Chicago without graduate school shaping my days? Where would I work? What would I pursue? Obviously, I may still get into grad school at Loyola or UIC. These other ideas may be unnecessary, but I don’t like being caught unaware.

All this waiting is not getting easier, but I am learning that it is absolutely undeniable that God is in control and that I can’t do anything to make my future happen. I have to just trust and do the next thing. What is the next thing right now? Find a way to serve this community that I am living in for only a short time. I am going to look for some drop in tutoring centers or something like that. I have not wanted to get too involved in a place that I am planning on leaving in 2 months, but now I realize that I don’t know what God’s timetable is, and so I can’t say that theses people here are not worth investing in. We shall see how that works out.

2 comments:

Amy said...

Bec,

I think that sounds like a great idea! There is no good reason not to and I'm sure you would be a wonderful blessing to them. Also, take a chill pill about the school stuff and wait until you DO have to deal with that possibility. Otherwise, you are probably stressing about absolutely nothing! If, by chance, you don't get accepted, I'm sure God has something way better for you. (I know that gets old, but it is never wrong!) So, now I'm done sounding like some crazy, preachy sister and I am happy for you. Whatever road you travel. I Love You!

Amy

TulipGrrl said...

Oh, Rebecca. . . So sorry to hear UofC didn't send their "Oh, we'd love to have you and love to give you lots of money!" letter. *huuug*

God is directing your steps, though, sometimes I know I'd like to have a detailed map and not just walk each step by faith.